i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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