my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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