Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
