Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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