if you like me you must not know who I am
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
