She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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