did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
