sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
