I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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