And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
