Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
