Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
