Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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