Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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