FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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