I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
