but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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