Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
