I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Mom said you looked used
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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