next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize