well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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