i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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