He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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