I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
