Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
