i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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