I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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