Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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