office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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