Soap is not a condiment
i may or may not be watching the land before time
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
