You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
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You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
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Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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