My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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