She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
