Where did you get a picture of my penis
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
