ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize