Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
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