If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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