4 words: hood of his car
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
True college students do jello shots in the library
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