Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton

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(859): View more from Kentucky

i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes

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(716): View more from New York

I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.

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The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Read it at the TFLN blog
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.

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(708): View more from Illinois

what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?

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(719): View more from Colorado

There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.

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(770): View more from Georgia

you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.

(1-770): View more from Georgia

But what if it got lost?

(770): View more from Georgia

its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.

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(757): View more from Virginia

We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick

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