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• (209): View more from California

  do you want me to make hamburgers?

  (541): View more from Oregon

  i'm vegan

  (209): View more from California

  i'll put lettuce on them

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Come join me

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on

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• (360): View more from Washington

  I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.

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• (559): View more from California

  But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?

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