I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
