Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
