I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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