Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
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I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
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Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
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