I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
