Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
