Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
