i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize
