so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
