So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
