I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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