She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
