I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
